Monday, January 13, 2014

Just start....

What's the best way to get back into blogging just start.  Something a friend a mentioned to me recently when I was having trouble starting something "Just start...You put it down then you can go back to it."  So I did just that started a New Year reading, learning French (yes I'm slowly learning French), meditating , organizing (truthfully that has been an ordeal) and now blogging.

So much has changed and 2013  gone but not forgotten.  There was a time I thought I would never return to blogging.  For a time I forgot that I had blog and couldn't remember what it looked like.  I guess I shut down from own blog.  But then there was a turning point back in late fall I missed writing in this space,  I missed checking everyone else blogs and being inspired.  Each time I would feel like writing I would snap a couple of pictures or think of something to write but never sit down to write.  I lost my gusto for a bit.  Part of it was because I was tired and busy being a mom, homeschooling, working, driving, etc.  The other part for not writing was the criticism from a few select former family members.  There was a time during my divorce that my blog was read and then used to criticize my parenting, choices and character.  Even now there could be the same select few people who may continue to read this blog or not at all but I decided to continue to write just for me.  I have always enjoyed sharing in this space it's like calling up a friend and sharing exciting news that is what this space is for me.  I allowed myself to feel stifled.

I also wasn't ready to write sooner because if I did want to share something other than knitting and crocheting it was going to be something pretty raw.  I couldn't just dive back into blogging and talk crafts and recipes without touching on few other day to day things.  It just wouldn't have felt authentic.

So now I return to blogging a bit more charged, independent, still growing and evolving a single homeschooling, part-time working mom to 5 kids.  Some things have changed I have new roles in my life.  After 10 years I returned to the work force part time accounting.  It's like the exact opposite of my crafting nature.  It was refreshing to return to the workforce.  I definitely do quite a bit more driving and juggling kids activities but I wouldn't change it.  What hasn't changed my love for reading (somehow that always sustains me even when I'm really busy), my craft addiction for yarn the crocheting and knitting never stopped. How could I possibly give up yarn? Just like my addiction to crafting magazines. I still carry around my activity basket with a journal, book, project and newspaper.  Discovered audio books and playaways are my new best friend.  They can make boring chores go by quickly.  They are great to listen if you have already read the book but want to hear it instead.  Or if you are like me with a long list of books on the Amazon wish list playaways can be a great alternative.

The baking and cooking continue but not much in the way of new recipes.  We have been relying on recipes we have used in the past.  Eventually the recipe binders need a cleaning up and updating they are busting with old and new recipes.  It's one of those clean up projects that I just want to hide but really I can ignore no more. 

I continue to homeschool that never waivered even at time when I was criticized by family for educating my children and later investigated during my divorce.  I have to say after all that I did come out stronger.  There is nothing like getting a crash course in defending my children and the choice to homeschool to a stranger.  My favorite moments adult meets child has nothing but nice things to say but still worries about socialization.  Really?  It was like saying "Yes hello Luisa I really enjoyed meeting your children they are great and since I couldn't find anything wrong with what your are doing I'm going to go with socialization."  The person really didn't say that but there is definitely a tone that bugs every homeschooling parent. 

In a very short amount I learned more about myself and came out much stronger many times taking the high road.  Little by little I learn more about myself.  I don't have any New Year's resolutions but I am looking forward to many new ideas in 2014.  I just want to start and do.

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